Crowdfunding A Hillary Clinton Press Conference

As of my typing this, it has been 262.9 days since Hillary Clinton’s press conference. Courtesy of the Washington post you can get a real time counter to see how long it’s been.

Obviously Hillary Clinton does not want to hold a presser because it would prevent her from keeping up the incredibly scripted image she needs to not look like a corrupt asshole.

However, emails recently obtained by Judicial Watch show us how to break this long trend of opaqueness from HRC: the media simply needs to crowdfund a multimillion dollar bribe donation to the Clinton Foundation and suddenly HRC will make herself available.

We here at Cut Jib Newsletter are all about getting Hillary to stand up to the press (lapdogs though they are, they’re better than nothing.) So starting immediately, all donations (after I skim off enough to finish building my AR-15 upper administrative fees) received to our Conservative Research Academic PAC between now and the first debate will go towards helping fund this necessary fee to get Clinton’s attention. If some other journalist wants to spearhead this initiative, I’ll direct whatever I can’t skim the money to the final donation.